Can not avoid judging

Credits to my artist friend Albi Yzo

Have you ever thought what’s it like to be another person?
Quite often when I am walking or when I take the bus, I find myself looking at other people. Sometimes I can’t help but wonder about their lives, their backgrounds, their current situation. I am curious to learn about their dreams and expectations, their hopes and most importantly their thoughts and feelings.

How does it feel to be that person? That tired old lady carrying the net shopping bag? Is she married? Probably. Does she have any children? Probably? I am curious, how does it feel like to be that old? How will I feel when I will be her age (if I will ever get to that of course)?

What about that young boy nervously scrolling up and down through his phone. Anxiety? Why? Is he waiting for something? What? Is he going to school, university maybe? Mmm, no bag, no books.

What about that young woman speaking over the phone? Sounds more like yelling to me… Who is she talking with? Does she study? What’s her hobby? Too dark-skinned for that bleached hair. I am curious about her hairdresser, who is the one suggesting. She sounds determined all right though, yeah she calls the shots. Oh, straightening her so short mini skirt. You can’t “fix” it young lady, it’s that short or that long, as it is. I am judging too much.

Some lads, watching the young woman, almost drooling over her… I don’t want to imagine what is it they are thinking. I don’t think I will like it. Again let’s not be judgemental. Skip then.

What about that young mom, trying to hush her new-born baby? What is it like to be pregnant? What was the labor like? Painful! How does she feel having the baby? Happy? Yes, even though right now she looks kind of desperate, the baby won’t stop screaming. How did her husband react when they found out? Or is she a single mom? What would it be like to raise the baby on your own? One thing is for sure, a hero mom she would be.

The young man on a business suit, expensive watch, a couple of iPhones. Taking the bus? Oh, he is taking off his wedding ring… hhmmm!

A couple of teen girls, heavy make up, too heavy to my opinion. Adding some more dark lipstick, perfect duck face for the perfect selfie. I can’t help but think of eventual hashtags such as: #bestfriend #beautiful #sexy #duckface #hot and stuff like that.

Oh here it goes. My bus stop. Bye!

What about you? Do you judge much? Nope? What do you do when you take the bus?

xoxo #kristinakoti


20 thoughts on “Can not avoid judging”

  1. Haha, the phone one is good. That's a common thing now days. It's great sitting in a waiting room and everybody is just glued to their phone. Then, I wonder, like you, is everybody scared to talk or are they really that addicted?

    1. Really? I thought it was just plain... My favorite was the young woman speaking loudly... and I think it's pretty obvious, her paragraph is much longer than the others 😀
      As for the last part, Kurtis, I think it's a bit both...

  2. It happens to everyone. Everytime, i find myself on someone's else shoes. I mean not just thinking about their lives, what do they do or what do they like, but also imagining how it feels to be like him or her. It makes you doubt Your way of living compared to the others. However, we cannot come to a conclusion about their lives only by watching them some min. Anyway, you can still understand something of their inner self from their eyes's reflection, they tell a lot. Really nice the paragraph off the guy taking off his wedding ring, this explains the happy life he is having lol. I enjoyed a lot this post 🙂

    1. Thank you Ina for reading me ?. It's true what you say though, you can't expect to know people with such a superficial look and yet some things, call it a hunch or the gut feeling you still manage to realize.

  3. It seems wordpress is preventing me to log in to comment... at least that theirs an alternate way to do it. Anyways back on topic; --- As i read through this and listening to some classical music, it somewhat does remind me of my past. People often judge me just because of who i am. I'm quite different then the many people i know of. And yet, many quite underestimate me for who i am. I often try to avoid judging others because i find it not right for someone to judge them as something only to see that they are actually more then what you ever thought of in a good way hence underestimating them. Judging by looks is a bad thing but judging their mind is even worse... I just wish several people could understand this instead of just ignore it and be ignorant about it...

    1. I see and I understand your point of view. Judging by appearance can't be avoided. We all do it, at some point even for minor things. But on the other hand what really makes the difference is our attitude towards our judgmental selves. If we take the distance or not.

  4. Hi Kristina, I think people watching (gosh that sounds weird) is such an interesting thing to do: everyone has a backstory but most people don't know about it but like your blog suggests, where is the line between curiosity and being judgmental.

  5. Hello from a fellow people-watcher 🙂 I love all your questions wondering about the lives of strangers. I do the same. Even though I don't get answers, it's fun to imagine them, maybe even write a story...

  6. Hey Kristina,
    This situation is so real! Whether its you who is subjected to stares and judgement or if you are staring and judging there's just no end to one's imagination. But yeah so long it's the right attitude and mind set we're good. And if not well not that we can do much about it and better to snuff out that negativity and move on. Was a great read by the way! 🙂

  7. I like to people-watch a lot, said in a most creepy way, but I promise it's not:P
    I like imaginning what they're doing, how old they are, what their background is like and so on.
    I find it's a great way to make the time pass:)

  8. Lovely idea, I have always thought about other people's lives and their perceptions of the world. I love how you've written this post, very insightful and questioning.

  9. Once upon a time, I believed that one shouldn't judge. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that it's impossible to completely withhold judgement. Judgement is how we make it more than two steps, when we're around other humans.

    The truly funny part is, I checked out your posts because you liked mine. Why is it funny? This is part of the topic of my next post. I'm writing about common misconceptions of who Jesus was, according to the Scripture. One of the things I'll be covering is judgement. We shall see how it turns out.

    1. Thank you for reading. And yeah I believed the same, that we shouldn't judge but it's nearly impossible. I think though that our actions make the difference, since we can't really always stop our thoughts. I will check your post when you publish it then ?


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