As I have mentioned before, I am not exactly the example of a positive thinker. And to write this single sentence, or to even come to such conclusion took a long time of struggling from my part.
But the realization it’s a first step, obviously. Fortunately I believe in my own growth and see into making it happen day after day. I am getting further away from the fixed mindset, that we are who are, born with certain traits and features which will never change no matter how much we try. If I were to believe such thing, then I would be doomed. To cut it short, I wouldn’t be who I am today and I wouldn’t be willing to learn anymore.
Speaking of, I still have a difficult skill to craft regarding Gratitude. I am not an ungrateful person, quite the opposite. I never forget people, the ones supporting me, helping me.
However, I still find myself forgetting to be grateful… I’ve improved a lot these last couple of years though.
A few years back, I found myself so alone… the ones I thought were my best friends, unfortunately weren’t the “best” and one of them especially was not a friend after all. I felt I had no one to turn to.
So I turned to myself, becoming my own motivator.
Feeling down? Yes. Can I change it? I guess so,but how? Think about good things. What is there so good to think about?
My mum coming to my room to show me a shirt she had bought for me… The shirt was horrible, but I was happy nevertheless. It finally rang to me, gratitude. Instead of what I didn’t have or what I thought I had lost, which thinking about it, I lost absolutely nothing.
Taking parts away from unhealthy friendships is a blessing, time tells.
I felt grateful for what I had: got a promotion, still studying but I was at a good point, learning German, going to the gym and eating much healthier. I was grateful I was doing a great job in treating myself right. I was grateful, I had the strength and the will to fight for what I wanted.
I was grateful I could make it on my own and be at peace with myself, alone but not lonely.
I was grateful I had my family supporting me… I looked around and I found out that I actually had friends all along. They were there, but I had been blind to see and value their worth, so I decided I would make things right this time.
I am grateful that my efforts paid off. Maybe I don’t see my friends everyday, life is quite busy and demanding for each one of us, but we keep in touch.