Overconfident?

Processed with VSCO with g3 preset
I like this picture of me very much and I feel that it connects with my content

I read somewhere, something related to knowledge and youth, when both embedded in one single person. In lots of the cases this person looks (is) judgemental, knows enough things to make him/her dangerous and something else that I honestly don’t remember…

Ok, so basically hhhmmm… this is me and I try to keep this side of me under control. I have been way worse, and when I look back at myself nearly a decade ago , “Bloody hell, was I dumb!” and it puts a smile on my face. “Was it really me?” “How could I be so silly?”.

I still am a judgmental creature. “I am surrounded by a bunch of morons. A horde of complete, incompetent idiots.” See, this what I am talking about.

 “I have no patience for incompetence or inefficiency. I am a damn perfectionist.” I think I know a lot more about things, and how they need to be done…. “Wait but I dooooo,  I actually do.”

I get frustrated: “But it’s so damn simple?” “What’s there so hard to understand?”

I almost never ask for any help, because I want things being done the perfect…. my way. “Besides I know everything so I don’t see the point.”

Question floating in the air: “What if I tried to ask for any help?”

“Who?” “Start from the people you trust?” “Do you even trust anyone?” Mmmm…

Overconfidence? Positive, to the fullest sometimes. Logical, rational reaction when feeling under pressure, as for instance when being “attacked”. “You know nothing! I know my shit, OK?” 

This is my definition so don’t take it that literally. ;p

I am immature then, hhhmmmph (sigh).

Despite my overconfidence, I am still going to turn down a job offer, I got a few days ago.

There are still a couple of things that I am sure of:

  • When I apply for a job, just because the hierarchy and the “royal titles” in your company are not that clear to me, don’t try to take me for a fool and convey it, like I applied for something else. Such a coincidence, the one you are offering is lower hierarchally from the one I applied for in the first place.

NAH! Mark down. It’s dishonest. Not transparent. If we start a working relationship on a deceitful basis we are going no where in the long run.

  • When you actually make it look even lower by assigning the “junior” label to my title (I repeat it’s lower than my current position and make it worse with the “junior”) I need some solid argument to back it up. The shitty excuse that I have no experience in the commercial field and that you need to test me and see yourself if I am fit for the position, just because you need to justify your costs, offering the salary you are offering, it’s not good enough.

NAH! Mark down. Not serious.

You know exactly well, my field of expertise, you can put me there if you want me that bad. Oh but nope, you don’t want to pay me quite enough do you?

  • The salary is the same with the my current one… Why should I take your offer? If I am being sort of “demoted”? What the hell? Try something more original at least.
  • My operating hours for the one you are offering are slightly different from the one I applied for… Mmmm do I need to explain it any further?

The most important of all: “I MADE IT PRETTY CLEAR DURING THE JOB INTERVIEWS, THAT HONESTY AND INTEGRITY ARE MY TOP VALUES.”

I take this shit very seriously, that’s why I am looking for a new job in the first place, not because I don’t like my current one. And this is something I disclosed quite “sound and clear” during a 2 session interview, 3 hours long including a written test.

Oh and the test was solely focused on communication and human resources management, so management skills, motivating ones, which looks like I excelled, since the feedback was “We see that you have been more concentrated on the being a manager mostly, but your knowledge on Excel is not that broad.”

(They just asked if I need to use it. I said, no, since the reports are ready to export from the designed filters of the software tools we have.)

So I might be immature. But I am not fucking stupid. There you go with my overconfidence.

xoxo #kristinakoti

 

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